What to Say (and Do) After a Pick Up Line Actually Works

Your pick up line actually worked, and now they’re smiling and you’re thinking, “Now what?”

I mean you decided to be brave and do a bit of flirting, so what’s your next move?

Well thankfully, it’s pretty simple. You don’t need to follow up with another pick up line or be super witty. Right now, intentionality is all that really matters. You’re taking the focus off of you, putting it on them, and keeping things light.

So before your brain logs out, here’s what to say and do right after delivering a successful pick up line.

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Keep Momentum Going Without Over-Performing

Right now, it’s important to keep things chill. So keep smiling, have a relaxed posture, don’t try to explain the joke, and use a simple transitional phrase like…

• “Hey, I’m (name) by the way. What’s your name?”
• “I hope that wasn’t too much.”
• “Sorry, I saw my chance and I really wanted to take it.”
• “On a scale of 1-10, how bad was that?”

And once you’ve introduced yourself, ask something situational. So think the eatery, event, or class you’re in. Or ask them about their day and what they were up to. And if the good vibes keep going, see if you can get their number or maybe even a first date planned.

Oh, and if this conversation is taking place online, then keep the questions coming and have them focused on them, don’t make it all about you.

You’re basically keeping the mood light without making things cringe, and putting curiosity over being “impressive.”

Focus On Your Body Language & Energy

Here’s what you want to do physically once this works.

1. Keep eye contact. It’s not a staring contest, but you want to make sure they know you’re interested and listening.
2. Have an open posture. This makes things feel more relaxed.
3. Match their energy levels. It’s a good way to make them feel more comfortable.
4. Respect any physical distance. They don’t know you yet so make sure they don’t feel like you’re trying to push boundaries.
5. Watch for reciprocated interest. So if they’re asking questions too, lean into it, stay present, and see if they start to withdraw. They don’t actually know you, so if they decide they’re not interested after all, then you can start disengaging as well.

When to (Smoothly) Escalate

If things are going well and you want to move on from simple banter and take it to the next step, then here are a few ways you can make that work.

First, listen for any details about them. Did they just drop something they’re interested in or like? Use that as a segway into a first date proposal. Or you can just do a simple suggestion pivot. So for instance, you could say something like, “Let’s sit and talk somewhere quieter,” or “Want to grab dinner sometime?”

A good time to do either of these things might be after a natural lull in the conversation, some shared laughter, or 10-15 minutes of good back and forth.

Some Common Mistakes After a Pick Up Line Works

It’s kind of easy to feel a bit excited when a high-risk maneuver actually works. So here are a few things to avoid so you can hopefully get to that first date:

• Turning it into a stand-up routine. Trust me, one pick up line is enough; you don’t want to overdo it.
• Trauma dumping. Sometimes when someone’s nervous, it’s easy to joke and let a bit of trauma slip like “Yeah, I didn’t have a (insert mom or dad) in my life to show me how to flirt right.”
• Doing an immediate ask for a number with no connection. Give it some time, see how they feel with a bit more interaction with you, and then ask.
• Panicking and self-deprecating too hard. It’s ok to do a bit of self-deprecating humor, but don’t go too hard into it. Take a deep breath, use some humor if you want, and remember to always keep things light.

The Real Secret to Taking It to the Next Level

And finally, remember, a pick line doesn’t mean an automatic win.

The real win is making them feel seen, relaxed, and safe.

You’re a stranger and they know nothing about you, so the shift from pick up line to connection really is everything.

So make sure not to talk all about yourself and treat them in the way you would want to be treated if the roles were reversed. It’s the perfect way to get to the first date and start things off on a really good note.

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